No chicory root for you.

Sunday, September 24th 2017

Destin, FL, New Orleans, LA and Los Angeles, CA

It’s 8am Central Time and I am officially miserable. I don’t know what time we went to sleep last night, but it was definitely too late. I have a major hangover and somehow manage to quickly get myself together for the day. We have committed to visiting our Grandmother at 9am. Around 8:30am we are ready to leave. I call an Uber and we head back over to Destin to pick up my brother’s FJ Cruiser. Our Uber driver is swerving pretty badly and eventually almost runs off the road. “I fell asleep”, he says. I look at Mike and we both buckle our seat belts.

After holding my breath for another 20 minutes our driver flies passed the parking lot at AJs. When he offers to turn back we insist on exiting at the next parking lot. A short walk later we are at the car.

From here I insist on Starbucks again. It will make us late, but I am basically nonfunctional at this point. My brother is driving very slowly. He must feel like I do. I run into Starbucks to grab my grande coffee and I am all of the sudden overwhelmed with nausea. Uh oh. I throw up in the bathroom.

15 minutes later we are walking up to Grandmother’s room. We are a full 30 minutes late. My brother ducks into the restroom on the way up. I know how he feels. We spend about an hour with our Dad and Grandmother. The doctor comes in and says that she is looking really good (yay!). Around 10:30am Mike and I say our goodbyes and vow to do a better a job of calling.

As we get to the car my brother asks if I can drive. I don’t want to, but I agree. We are off! The plan is to drop me off at the New Orleans airport on the way back to Austin. I am hoping to hit town a little bit early so that we can stop for some Cajun food.

After about 15 minutes on the road I am still feeling terrible. I pull into a McDonalds for something salty. A piece of sausage and 4 chicken nuggets later I am feeling much better. For the next 3 hours I drive and my brother naps. Somewhere outside of New Orleans I pull over for gas and Mike takes over driving. As we get close to the airport he asks me to find him a hotel. I find one a few miles from the airport and he asks if I can take a cab from there. I am bummed there will be no beignets and coffee with chicory root, but he looks very sick, so I agree.  

After making sure that Mike gets checked in I call another Uber. The driver is pretty curious about what I’m doing at the Super 8 by myself with no bags. I want to remain mysterious but the driver is really friendly so I explain my day to him. He advises that I eat a late lunch at Dooky Chase’s before going through security and drops me off right in front of it.

Lunch is friend chicken and collards and it is delicious. I heavily consider a beignet but change my mind when I realize they are only sold in sets of three. From here I make my way to my gate and buy something called gooey cake and a cup of coffee. This combination of bitter and sweet is truly mid blowing.

Once I board, I settle in with a few bad movies from the Delta onboard entertainment system. Eventually I land back at LAX and take the shuttle over to my car in Lot C.  That was an eventful trip and I am looking forward to doing it again next year!

It's Spring Break 1995.

Saturday, September 23rd 2017

Destin, FL

It’s 8am Central Time and I am dragging myself out of bed. It’s miserably early, but I only have one full day in Destin and am determined to make the most of it. Last night my brother explained to me that our grandmother has gone into the hospital. He did not have a lot of details other than it’s related to an infection. My Dad, who was supposed to be back home in Austin, is currently at the hospital.

I quickly get ready and head down to the “hot breakfast” provided by our hotel. I am convinced they will have bacon but I am quickly proven wrong. Apparently hot breakfast is code for you-can-make-your-own-waffle. I am disappointed and request that my brother drives us to Starbucks. Luckily, he agrees.

Once we get through the Starbucks drive through I carefully add a packet of coconut oil and ghee to my grande coffee. Yes, I travel with my own butter; breakfast is served.

Soon we arrive at the Fort Walton Medical Center. We take our time parking the car and walking up to my grandmother’s room. Neither of us know what to expect.

We see our Dad first when we enter the room. There is a nurse changing out our grandmother’s IV and she looks happy and alert. We both sigh in relief.

Dad explains that she has a skin infection called cellulitis. So far it’s mild and only in her skin. It’s not serious unless it gets into her blood. Eventually the nurse finishes up and we all sit down to catch up. We had planned to take our grandmother to the beach and then out to dinner for a post birthday celebration. We are all disappointed to hear that will no longer happen. My grandmother is quick to point out that I have lost weight and that my brother has gained weight. I laugh heartily; I truly love this woman.

We discuss our travels to get there, health status and, most importantly, Texas football. After a few hours it’s time for lunch. My grandmother has her lunch delivered to her bed. My brother and I are temporarily dismissed to go find our own food.

We head in the direction of the beach and eventually find a place called Al’s Burger Bar. I am skeptical, but my mushroom-swiss burger ends up tasting amazing. We also get a table that is literally on the beach. I cannot believe how easy it is to get a good meal and a good table in Destin. After lunch we discuss our plans for the rest of the day. Grandmother can’t stay awake for more than a few hours, so we decide to go back and visit for another 2 hours and then head over to the beach before sunset.

I did not bring a swimsuit, so we make a quick stop at Target on the way back. I am unsuccessful, however, we decide to head back anyways. I don’t really have to go swimming. As we pull into the parking lot we are intercepted by Dad. Grandmother is napping and he is going to drive to Kohl’s to buy some more clothes for himself. We hitch a ride. The trip to Kohl’s ends up much more fruitful than Target, I acquire new swimsuit and a pair of sweats. My Dad strikes out, however; I guess this is his Target.

When we get back to the hospital Grandmother is awake again. We talk some more until she falls back asleep.

From there Mike and I make several stops. Gas, beer, hotel, beach. Boom!

I am laying out in my brand new Kohl’s swimsuit on top of my shower towel from the Day’s Inn. We have a cooler of beer and my brother has produced two cozies from his FJ Cruiser. The beach is lovely. The air is warm and breezy, the sand is soft and the ocean is as calm as bathtub. The gulf is so different from the California coast. We spend a few hours drinking, swimming and catching up before my Dad arrives. With his help we finish up our cooler beer and head up to the restaurants to find some dinner. As we approach the hostess station we are all surprised at how empty everything looks. It turns out that the electricity is out and all of the restaurants in this area are closed for the night. Lame.

We pile into the FJ and head over to Destin. We start out at AJ’s Oyster Bar. It’s enormous and reminds me of MTV’s Spring Break Special from 1995. I ask for any kind of beer from Sweetwater Brewery and am told they don’t have it. Ugh. Now I am on a mission. From here we head over to a few other restaurant-bars and eventually find one with Sweetwater. I am drunk and thankfully Dad remembers to order us some food (partying with your parents has its advantages!).

After a dinner of nachos and chicken wings we decide to head back to our hotels. I explain to Dad and Mike about Uber and they are both fascinated (to be fair, Uber is not allowed to operate in Austin, so they do have plausible deniability). Somehow we all end up in one Uber even though our hotels are not by each other. We drive across town to drop my Dad off and then our driver drops us off at a bar next door to the Days Inn. As soon as we enter I know we made a mistake. I am beat and can barely drink anything else. After about 30 minutes we head back.

I quickly shower and then pass out almost immediately. Tomorrow is going to rough.

Pick up your purse, Now!

Friday, September 22nd 2017

Los Angeles, CA and Destin, FL

It’s 10am Pacific Time and I am pulling out of my driveway to head over the LA airport for my flight to Pensacola, FL. It’s the day after my grandmother’s 91^st birthday and I am going to Florida to celebrate! I make a quick stop at my office to grab my laptop charger and headphones and arrive at the airport far ahead of schedule. Once I get parked and through security I start my hunt for food. Eventually I find a Counter and order a burger with fried egg and bacon. It’s delicious.

My flight boards right on time and as the airplane door is closing the flight attendant makes a frantic announcement “Pick up all of your bags that are on the floor”. No one does. She repeats herself and then has to physically walk over to me and say “Pick up your purse, there is water on the floor”. I turn my head and there is growing puddle of water creeping from the back of the plane to the front. About one minute later the flight attendant asks us to deplane. They are going to decommission the plane and try real hard to get all of us to our correct destinations.         

I immediately open my United Airlines app and start looking for alternate routes. There are none. The good news, however, is that I have a hefty layover in Houston and there is a chance that I still may make it in time. We are all instructed to wait in the gate area for an update in 30 minutes. I grab a large comfortable chair in the closest bar and catch up on work.

After 30 minutes of delay the airline announces that we have a new plane and will be boarding in half an hour. I am impressed with United’s efficiency and hopeful that I will make my connection.

I spend the flight from Los Angeles to Houston quietly playing Plants v Zombies. The guy next to me looks talkative so I put on my headphones but decide to not play any music. Around 4:45pm Central Time our flight lands in Houston. The flight attendant asks all passengers without tight connections to remain in their seats to allow other to deplane first. Of course, nobody does. My connection is at 6:10pm and I am feeling good. It takes almost 30 minutes to get out of the plan, find the sky tram, and arrive at my connecting gate. I am finally there with 15 minutes to spare.   

While I am waiting at the gate I get a text from my brother. He is on the beach in Pensacola and doesn’t feel up to driving to the airport to pick me up anymore. He asks if I can take a cab. I agree. I also offer to drive from Pensacola to our hotel in Ft Walton beach. I am definitely too nice.

After an hour plane ride and a 30 minute Uber drive I finally arrive in Pensacola. I am ready for a beer and some bar food but my brother looks completely beat and practically begs me to drive us to the hotel.

Eventually we get checked in and I announce that I am taking my brother’s car to get food and beer. It’s getting pretty late so I opt for Whataburger and a tall can of Yuengling from the gas station. I eat dinner in our Days Inn hotel room and eventually fall asleep. We have an early day tomorrow.